The ones i love...

Today i am in a space where i am just missing my aunt and brother
both passed away 2010.
i didn't get a chance to say goodbye, or mourn,
 not even see them on their last day when laying and facing up,
 just had a phone call, and somehow i had to understand that they no more.
 i woke up the next day and the world around me was going on just perfect,
i had this pain inside and everyone said its ouk.
i hated every person i saw laugh, i hated every smile,
 didn't understand how could they smile, what is there to smile about
when a life is gone...
we never know when they gonna pass on, regardless of age, it hurts the same.
i miss them. so much.
i felt stuck i really did, didn't  know how to be the next day,
 if had to explain to the world my pain
part of me expected it to stop, share the pain with me but i didn't
and somehow deep inside, i always bare the emptiness
i wish i just had that moment of closure
not even a vivit to the grave feels that emptiness

but if u can hear me out there, wherever you are ...i miss you
"I remember the first time You laughed with me

I remember the promises You would never leave my side
Now I'm standin' with news of a tragedy
Standin' here with a fragile heart

See I never shed a tear I stayed strong for them, oh yes I did
When everybody disappears it's only you that keeps me strong
I can't imagine goin' on without you in my life
Goin' on with a fragile heart"

 Yolanda Adams - Fragile Heart